food, healthy living, holiday, weight loss

not my finest hour

Saturday night was my work Christmas party. I was on point all week and had been on a run the day before and had yoga that morning and went in with a plan. Got to the party and all was well and good.

But then two things happened.

1) My one coworker brought this todiefor artichoke cheese dip.
2) I saw the dessert table.

And then my plan went poof.

// I say “artichoke cheese dip,” it’s a bit misleading. It was more like a couple pounds of baked cheese with bits of artichoke in it. My co-worker tried to argue that it was low fat cheese, but, I’m telling ya it didn’t matter because it was pretty much all cheese. And I seriously just kinda stood there spreading it on one tortilla chip after another.

With dessert, I was able to ignore the cheesecake and carrot cake and lemon squares and cookies and pastries. It was the stupid mini cream puffs and stupid mini eclairs that were my downfall. So cute. So mini. So yummy. So easy to just pop into your mouth. And pop I did. One after another after another.

It wasn’t exactly mindless eating, I mean I knew exactly what I was doing, but it was pretty close. I didn’t even bother with a plate. I had once again turned into the quintessential fat girl at a party, hovering around the food table. You’d think my staff photo — which is still from March or April of last year — right above the appetizer buffet would have been a deterrent, a reminder of how far I’d come, but nooooope.

And then, I still ate other appetizers and dinner at the party, too. Going into the party I had roughly 40 Weekly Points left and they were all gone, just like that. A couple of my Activity Points, too.

Thing is, in the grand scheme of things it wasn’t that bad. I tracked everything, and all told I consumed, oh, about 2400 calories for the day. Minus the 300 or so I burned in Ashtanga that morning and my net calorie intake was, well, about average for a normal non-dieting human being. Maybe a little high for a woman of my height and weight, but still not that bad. It’s only when you consider that I normally eat 1300 – 1400 calories a day that you realize just how much above and beyond I went at the party.

Of course, it would seem that all of the exercise I had done earlier in the week helped, because when I stepped on the scale this morning I weighed the exact same as I did last week. And, believe me, I am so okay with that I can’t even tell you. I think I just need to remind myself that this time of year it’s a holiday, not a holimonth. So pace myself and don’t use one party as an excuse to go crazy, ’cause I gots a lot more parties coming up and I need to treat them like normal days. I could also take my own advice from Thanksgiving and perhaps shift goals. That is, spend the rest of the month working on maintenance instead of necessarily losing weight. I had forgotten how hard the holidays can be and I have to be realistic about the next few weeks.

How was everyone else’s weekend?

Love from the ashes,
Lady Lazarus

3 thoughts on “not my finest hour”

  1. I have the hardest time when I go to a party and see an amazing spread. I literally have to go in with a game plan and try to avoid it. This time of year is going to be especially challenging.

    The important thing is to bounce back and move forward 🙂


  2. Bouncing back and moving forward is definitely my plan from here on out! I was just totally caught off guard by how good the buffet was. We have another work potluck next week but hopefully I'll be a little bit more prepared for that.


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