family, memory lane, plus size fashion, weight loss

three times a bridesmaid….

Here’s hoping that whole ….Never a bride thing isn’t true, as Sissy’s wedding on Saturday was my third time. Well, actually, I’ve twice been a bridesmaid and this was my first time as a Maid of Honor. First time was for the wedding of my cousin Eric and his wife Kathy.

July 2008

I’m going to be honest:  I have absolutely no recollection of weighing this much at the wedding. It was years before I hit my “Before” weight of 311 but I’m clearly hovering on that edge. I couldn’t even begin to guess the number but I’m going to put it at close to 300. At this time I was in a committed relationship with a man I thought I was going to marry. That, obviously, didn’t happen but if it had I would most definitely not be where I am today. I wouldn’t be the woman I am right now and I would, most likely, not only still be weighing close to 300 I quite possibly would have gone above 311. It’s just one of those things that when I think back to being in that relationship, I have a mental image of what I looked like and it was so far removed from that above picture.


Anyway, two years later it was for the wedding of my bestest friend, The Bookslut.

June 2010

About a year before this photo was taken, that guy mentioned above broke up with me. (We actually went bridesmaid dress shopping, like, two weeks after the break-up. Yeah. That was fun.) So after the break-up, instead of turning to food I did the exact opposite and took it as an opportunity and started to lose weight, which is why I’m somewhat smaller in this photo than in the first one.

Of course, soon after the wedding I fell off the proverbial wagon, which explains how I looked like this by the end of the year.

December 2010

This time I was the MOH to my lovely little sister and was so happy to stand next to her as she married her best friend. When she was walking down the aisle I took a peek at her intended and just looking at the look he had on his face when he was watching her was enough to make me cry so then I looked at my sister and dad and that made me cry. Thank you Gavin Scott Salon for waterproof mascara.

And thank you Ashley specifically for my amazing hair. All I told her was that I wanted something with a vintage vibe. As soon as she started talking about pin curls in the back and a swoop up front I was sold.

I told a few people that if I had to be the single older sister of the bride I was gonna look damn hot doing it.

True story.

I honestly don’t remember the size of the dress on the left but my guess is 26 or 28. The dress from this weekend was a 14. And can we talk about the fact that my sister and I these days take up almost as much space as I did five years ago?

Actually. Let’s not talk about that fact.

As much as I love the picture of my sister and I, my absolute favoritest picture from the wedding was this one.

That would be the flower girl who is the daughter of my cousin Claudine (we were waiting until the last minute to put her in the dress). I wanted a picture with her and she started doing silly faces so I started doing silly faces. She had the best time hanging out with the bridal party and referred to us as her “sparkle girls.”

Ah, to be a three-year-old again where your biggest drama of the day is being potty-trained and asked to put on a pull-up for the ceremony. We convinced her they were just special underwear and all the girls were wearing them. Then the entire bridal party and her mom hiked up our skirts to show off our Spanx. Like magic it was enough to convince her.

Best wedding ever. Honestly. I love my extended family and we have the best times at weddings and it’s just so much fun getting to see and hang out with everyone at the reception. My speech was a hit: this Tudor nerd managed to throw a Queen Elizabeth I quote in there and while everyone gave me some strange looks I managed to perfectly tie it all together. ‘Cause that’s how I roll, yo.

Plus my dad’s long-time friends were there, most of whom I hadn’t seen in probably a decade (one told me I had grown-up and matured into quite the knock-out) and family friends from my parents church as well. My sister was absolutely stunning and she and her new husband were both so very, very happy which is all that really matters.

Also, not only do I have my mother’s permission to get married in Vegas, at this point I think she’s actually hoping I really follow through on that plan.

Seems like there were a ton of weddings going on this past weekend! Anyone else attend one?

Love from the ashes,
Lady Lazarus

9 thoughts on “three times a bridesmaid….”

  1. You and your sister both look absolutely stunning (love your vintage hair, and love her very classic style!), but I agree that I love the picture of you and your little cousin best. That girl has some spunk- she's going to provide you with years of fun to come, I'm sure!


  2. You look beautiful and that dress is gorgeous. So glad you had fun.

    I've been a MOH three times and once had to have gussets put into my dress because it didn't come in a 26. On top of that, the dress was fugly. I looked like a giant eggplant.

    So glad you've made the changes you've made and you inspire me as well.


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