Anklegate 2016

So, I’ve had lots of sprained and twisted ankles in my life. I know how to deal with them which is why I didn’t go to the ER last Tuesday. Instead, I RICEd — Rest. Ice. Compression. Elevation. Over the past week, it had gotten better. To the point that I was able to walk around. I had a limp, sure, but I was mobile and maneuvering up and down the stairs at the house.

Only, because I have had lots of sprained and twisted ankles in my life, I know what they are supposed to look like. This…this was bad. Like, really bad. Like most of my left foot black and blue bad. 

I am a pessimist. I also have anxiety. I am also about a day away from my period starting. So when BC came home Monday night and casually mentioned that his manager told him her sister had been walking around on a “sprained” ankle for a month that turned out to be broken, I freaked the fuck out.

WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME THAT?

He pretty much just confirmed all my fears. Five minutes after he walked in the door, our discussion turned from deciding what to have for dinner into me having a bit of a melt down.

For my own sense of sanity and paranoia, I decided we should go to the ER so I could have X-Rays taken. 

This actually happened a few years ago: I decided to randomly take up rollerblading and ended up with what I thought was just a sprained elbow or something. I called work, said I was going to the ER, then decided I probably should go to the ER since I told them that. Turned out, that elbow was broken.

I was more optimistic this time, though. After all, I was walking on it and mobile and it was feeling better, I had very little pain. Still, that paranoid voice was there so we headed over to the nearby ER.

Got checked in and got into a room. All told we were there for about three hours, although only about 20 or 30 minutes of that was actual patient doctor time. But BC and I are both librarians, so we came prepared.

About half an hour or so after my X-Rays, the doctor came back in.

So, it’s broken. Probably looking at six to eight weeks.

Me: 

Doctor: 

Oh. Did you have something planned? 

Me: 

I’m a runner. I’m registered to run the Akron Half in September.

Turns out, ol’ Doctor Andy is a runner as well. And because he’s a doctor his math skills are probably better than mine. Which means he knows how training plans work and knows when a runner would have to start training to be able to run a September half. He also knows that those 6-8 weeks he quoted me don’t count rehab and recovery time.

The hospital near us don’t have an ortho department, so he sent me home in a splint and a list of doctors to call. After getting home I had to figure out how to navigate this two floor house with crutches and was just exhausted. I also spoke to my manager (after debating calling her at 9:30 pm. BC assured me this was an exception to the rule) then just went to bed.

Tuesday morning I made an appointment with one of the suggested bone doctors and that afternoon headed over. BC was working and I already felt like he’d been doing way too much to take care of me, so I called my dad (who I also figured had a far more flexible schedule so a last minute thing wouldn’t be a big deal).

Doctor was impressed I’d been walking on it for a week and that even with all of that and very little stability, there had been no more damage. My x-rays looked good. If such a thing as a beautiful break exists, I think I have it. He quoted only 4 – 6 weeks which, y’know, sucks but is better than the 6-8.

Oh, but wait: Since your break is looking so good despite mobility and lack of support, let’s see what happens with immobility and full support. That means putting you in a full on, up-to-your knee, no weight bearing allowed cast complete with a set of crutches.

Thankfully I have a job that allows for working from home, so this is pretty much me for the next few days:

Not going to lie — I’m suddenly regretting all those recent weeks of binge watching episodes of My 600 Pound Life. Was a great idea, keeping me motivated and all, up until I suddenly feel like one of those patients before their surgery.

And I’m being perfectly honest, one of the things I’m most worried about is that I can’t really weigh myself for the next few weeks. It’s just not feasible with the cast. It makes me so nervous because I use that as a tool to monitor myself. Just last week I made a plan, an actual concrete plan, to get my shit together in that regard and now…. I just have to kind of go on faith that my plan is working. I have to have trust in myself and my food choices.

If nothing else, at least I can’t use exercise as an excuse to over indulge.

Also, at this point I can’t even think about Akron and my half-marathon. After not running the 5K/10K Challenge Series last weekend, Akron was supposed to be my comeback and now I don’t know. I don’t know how this ankle will go. I don’t know how rehab will go. Obviously that new training plan of mine — which was scheduled to start in exactly one week — isn’t happening. But I don’t know where I’ll be in mid-July when my usual training plan would start. I just don’t know.

And, because I don’t know and because I can’t spend the next several months worrying, I’m just not even going to think about it. I am going to try and force myself to take it one day at a time. This is not something I’m good at (I’m terrible at living in the present) so this is going to be a real challenge.

I am just going to keep up the mantra that this will make for a good chapter in my book. Which you should totally go pre-order just because you feel sorry for me.

Love from the ashes,

Lady Lazarus